As expected, my new job truly kicks ass. I did a complete 180 in my head, stayed positive about the direction I was going and really psyched myself up for this new gig, and great things started happening despite the fact that it was just my first day. I’m feeling really good about things and I’ve got my eyes on the prize. Not that I’m really about to quote Sister Act 2, but if you wanna be somebody and you wanna go somewhere, you better wake up and pay attention!
I know I’m going to excel, and the idea of fumbling this one is really not on my mind, but I’ve been re-evaluating past work experiences anyway just so that I don’t make the same mistakes twice. And, from my own experience, if there’s anything I can tell you young women (well, anybody, really) who are about to graduate college and enter the work force, it is so, so crucial to keep it together and not get too emotional about work. And I don’t direct this to young women cause we’re all so prone to crying and having fits of hysteria at the office or anything — I know and you know that we’re smarter and better than that. I’m directing this to you cause as essential as it is to form bonds with other women in your desired industry, you really gotta watch your ass about the friends you make. Some women talk a lot of shit and it’s so important to keep your head straight, stay polite, and don’t get caught up in it if you want to be successful. I’ve gotten this piece of advice so many times and I didn’t realize how important it was until I was reexamining my last editorial stint.
Given the infrastructure of that particular magazine, I would’ve eventually moved on anyway. The work environment was definitely not conducive to my growth, and it was only worsened by my coworkers, but if there’s one thing I regret in life, it’s leaving that position the way I did. What really sucks is that my coworkers were otherwise really nice girls, but they did nothing but complain about the job and the bosses on a daily basis. And I totally saw this coming from a mile away, but when I was put in the back office with them and I hung out with them on a daily basis, I just started letting all that shit talk get to me. I started off going into the office and really trying to get a job done, and by fall I was getting home from the office crying as soon as I walked through my front door cause these heads had me thinking so negatively about how my work was being received there.
Obviously, in retrospect I shouldn’t have listened to them. I should’ve minded my own damn business because in the end I got all emotional and I let all that shit talk knock my hustle. I was no longer able to meet deadlines and I was taking everything so personally. I ended up leaving bitterly and unprofessionally, and worst of all, I screwed all the relationships I’d built with other people in the industry because of it. Not to mention that negative attitude trailed me for months and started off a massive downswing. I was so deep into that funk that I got myself into a car accident.
If there’s anything I really regret, it’s letting that bullshit get under my skin like that. But at the same token, it’s a hard lesson that I’m glad I finally learned. It’s a cold world out there, and no matter how friendly or caring they may seem, people who try to drag you into that drama and talk that mess in your ear really don’t give a fuck. They are not about helping you, they are about dragging you down into whatever misery that has befallen them.
It’s so crucial to know what you want and stay focused and surround yourself with supportive people and positive thoughts. And most importantly, you gotta have faith in yourself cause nobody else is gonna do it for you.
